Rainithing The Spark by Dr. Bruce Chalmer (ARC)

Synopsis

Create A Relationship That Lasts

Dr. Bruce Chalmer’s Reigniting the Spark shows couples how to build a lasting relationship full of passion and fulfillment. You’ll learn how to improve your communication, have better sex, and avoid pointless arguments.Dr. Chalmer combines his expertise in science with thirty years of experience as a couples therapist to show how you can restore intimacy and overcome any relationship problem to create and maintain a lively, loving, lasting relationship. He offers a unique perspective on the role of faith—not necessarily religious—in relationships. Whatever your faith background, religious or secular, Dr. Chalmer’s approach to faith as a key to unlocking intimacy will inform and inspire you. This book explores the most common issues that sap the happiness out of a relationship and shows you exactly what to do to turn it around. Written in a relatable and easy-to-understand style, Reigniting the Spark will help you better understand yourself and your partner so you can both be more satisfied. Whether you’re reading alone or with a partner, Reigniting the Spark will teach you:

· How to build and restore intimacy, trust, and a deep connection in your relationship

· How to identify triggering issues like trauma that could be sapping the joy out of your relationship, and exactly what to do about it

· A list of bad reasons people get married—and one good one

· How to go from plain old sex, to good sex, to sacred sex

· How to be your best self when your partner has been unfaithful

· How to know when to break up, and when to work through the inevitable growing pains in your relationship

Reigniting the Spark is for any couple who’s ready to create a stronger, more fulfilling relationship. You’ll love this book if you like these books:

· The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by Jon Gottman and Nan Silver

· Kosher Sex by Shmuley Boteach

· Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel

· The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

· Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendricks and Helen Hunt.

When you experience your own existence as part of something much bigger, you can recognize that sacredness all around you.

I don’t usually read self-help books, but not because they seem bad or useless to me, but because I love fiction so much, that my life goes by without running into the rest of the literary genres of which it is not a bad idea to discard.

However, at this moment I’m making a clear exception, since was the same doctor present here who contacted me through my email some time ago inviting me to read his book Rainithing The Spark.

I said yes immediately, but I clarified to him—as I usually clarify to all the people who write to me with such requests—that sometimes it takes me a while to read a book in English, since it is not my native language. However, when I got into the book, I COULD NOT STOP. The fiction within him comes from everywhere: from every tip, from every explanation, from every story told, from every reality. From what I can tell, this book goes beyond a self-help book; this is a book that we should all have, whether or not we have a partner.

Faith isn’t about what reality is. Faith is about what reality means.

Rainithing The Spark, as the synopsis says, is based on the idea of rekindling the flame within marriage or within a couple relationship, analyzing why those couples became couples, and why they become separated. If there was an infidelity, to analyze why it happened. If there were other circumstances, such as the love fade, to analyze why that also happened; and so on, treating why and issues within the same argument of the book that in some way or another makes us feel identified, or at least, we can identify in people close to us.

However, this is not the only thing that Rainithing The Spark of Bruce Chalmer keeps; there is much more and that is why I have said before that this book should be read by everyone.

Tolerate anxiety without dissolving into panic—is a key skill of relationships.

In a very important part of the book, Dr. Chalmer mentions a word that I did not think a couples therapist could mention: FAITH. And the explanation given about it in this book is so interesting, so (at least to me) new, which is precisely why I recommend that everyone read this book. Here, faith is explained beyond fundamentalism or religious parameters. It is even explained far beyond the meaning of the word itself (that meaning that we find in the dictionary). And the word itself, here, does not come with pretense or deceit: it comes pure and simple, explanatory and meaningful, and can surprise anyone very much why it is necessary to keep it in mind in a relationship; especially if there are conflicts or problems within the couple. I’m not going to spoil anything regarding the term Faith mentioned in Rainithing The Spark; you will be the ones who know what I am talking about when you start reading.

Getting to the right argument itself a form of intimacy, because you have to be honest with yourself and your partner without being distracted by panic.

And taking that risk is an act of faith.

Personal message…

In a particular case, this book also came to me at a very particular moment in my life, where it fit perfectly in a situation I was experiencing (not so much regarding my affairs as a couple, but beyond, with other deeper things), so I can say once again that coincidences do not exist, but causality does.

Dr. Chalmer, you came into my life at a very ideal moment: your book has helped me understand a lot of things that I later mention to you in a more private moment.

Thank you.

Some say the world will end in fire,

some say in ice,

From what I’ve tasted of desire, I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate, to say that for destruction ice, is also great and would suffice.

Robert Frost’s poem: “Fire and Ice”.

Finally, I RECOMMEND this book, very much, RIGHT NOW. If you read in English, don’t waste your time and acquire it. On Amazon it’s at an incredible price and if you are in the United States and require a couple’s therapist, goes to Dr. Bruce Chalmer, I recommend him with my eyes closed.

Ah… And don’t forget to rate the reading at the end. It’s the best way to tell the writer how much we liked his work.

Be kind, don’t panic and have faith.

Rate: ★★★★★